My Mistress left not very happy today and the feeling is beaking my heart since yesterday night. i broke Her trust and disobeyed a clear instruction again. i hid one of my id which i still believe was totally unintentional but it did upsetting Her and upsetted Her really bad. What can i do right now is what is important ! She was upset so She could say anything. I know She loves me and She did not mean a lot of it but what i could do was to stay calm, listen and monitor my behaviour than Hers. Talking back to my Mistress would simply elevate Her anger more which is not good for both of U/us so i stayed calm. I tried my best and let Her say anything She liked. I start again by pushing myself into deeper submission and focusing my attention to my Lady by:

1. Admitting my mistake that i broke Her trust and believing that this is not the end and i can win it back. She loves me and She will always keep the doors open to help me be myself what i truely am. Her lover and Her slave.

2. By monitoring my behaviour on moment to moment basis. Monitoring my Mistress's emotions that am i pleasing to Her ? I need to learn to anticipate and be the mind reader.

3. Although She was the main character of my fantasies always, my roleplays or any art i work on. I need find ways to show Her that more openly and divert my attention to Her only for She is my Goddess who is real and i can touch and feel.That puts all my sexual energies towards Her too. i am sure it will please Her.

4. Write my journal everyday esp. about WHAT I DID TO PLEASE MY MISTRESS TODAY? AND WHAT DUTIES AT HOME I PERFORMED. It should be a house rule(i would suggest to Her) as it helps me put my thoughts together. I should read back at least one post back as i have bad memory and i forget things easily. It keeps me submissive and focused which is most pleasing to my Mistress.

TO REMEMBER:
GET TO BED BEFORE 12:30 and SHUT UP TO NOT TO DISTURB HER.
DO DUTIES THAT ARE YOURS TO MAKE HER LIFE EASIER. BE PROUD OF HER VALUED SERVANT
THANK HER FOR TRAINING AND KEEPING YOU AS LOVED ONE
NO TALKING BACK TO YOUR LADY
BE PREPARED TO BE PUNISHED FOR DISOBEDIENCE OR MISTAKES. ADMIT AND BE RESPONSIBLE RATHER THAN TRYING TO SAVE YOUR ASS. IT WILL PISS HER OFF MORE. WHEN ADMONISHED, KEEP YOUR EMOTIONS IN CHECK. REGARDLESS OF HOW HUMLIATING OR HARD THE PUNISHMENT IS, REMEMBER THAT IT IS PART OF YOUR TRAINING AND WILL ONLY SERVE TO MAKE ME MORE SKILLED AND VALUED SLAVE.
YOU ARE HER SPIRIT. SHE LOVES YOU AND EXPECTS THE VERY BEST FROM YOU.